I’m pretty sure 12 years ago when we were awaiting the arrival of our first child that my husband would have said he’d like to have a boy someday. But our first born was a girl. She came into this world fighting to take her first breath, determined to overcome her shaky arrival and in the process wrapped her dad around her finger. She also looked just like him, making me wonder if I had anything to do with her creation.
While awaiting the arrival of our second child we were sure it was a boy. That is, until at 4 months, the sonogram confirmed it was a girl. My husband might have been a tad disappointed for the briefest of instances that our baby wasn’t a boy. But he rebounded in the blink of an eye, looked at the sonogram screen and grinned at his seemingly long-legged, healthy daughter.
WB, my husband, is one of four boys. Little girls were almost alien to him. He had a hard enough time figuring out his wife, much less two daughters. So when we found out 5 years after our second was born that we were again expecting, I thought for sure that God was giving WB his boy. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with one of those, but I knew I’d figure it out quick enough. Sonogram at 4 months confirmed another girl. I breathed a sigh of relief, another healthy girl. I stole a glance at WB. Once again he was staring at the sonogram screen grinning ear to ear. He squeezed my hand and boastfully told the nurse, “Another girl, no problem. I know girls. I’ve got the routine down.”
And he does. Or what he doesn’t know he is learning fast enough. His daughters are now almost 5, 9, and 12. Just like any other Dad of a daughter he jokes of cleaning guns when the boys start coming around. But all jokes aside, he is making sure his girls hearts are well protected and treasured.
He has started taking each one on Daddy Dates. The girls LOVE this time with their Dad. He checks with them on the date and time and gives them an idea of how to dress, as he likes to keep them guessing as to where they are going. He picks them up at the bottom of the stairs promptly at the designated time. He holds open doors for them. He engages them in conversation that lets them know he cares what they have to say and he respects their views on things.
Outside of Daddy Dates he brings them flowers on very special occasions, he has figured out his girls like pretty flowers. He celebrates their milestones with high fives, hugs, and sweet words. He’s learned girls don’t respond too well to boot-camp commands, but instead to words spoken firmly and with affection. Instead of running from the tears my girls shed, he has learned that a hug usually helps stop the crying. He’s also taught them that girls can shoot, fish, engineer, and build right alongside of the boys and still be a beautiful girl.
WB is teaching my girls a little at a time how their future boyfriends and husbands should treat them. By the time they are ready to date they will know that they need to be in a relationship with someone that will respect them and their feelings. WB is confirming a little bit each day that their hearts are to be treasured and protected. He is teaching them that a little roughness around the edges is okay, as long as the heart of who they seek is good. He lets them know, in a thousand little ways, that whoever wins their heart must be worthy.
WB has embraced the role God gave him of being a Daddy to three girls. He doesn’t question how things turned out, even when I nag him with questions if he is really okay with “no boys”. He just gives me that grin, the one that captured my heart. And I can’t help but thank God that WB is the one who now protects my daughters hearts as well.
Do you think girls tend to find husbands that remind them of their Dad? And I really have no clue about boys, but is it the same way- they tend to find wives like their Moms? Or maybe we try to find someone who is nothing like our Dad or Mom, what do you think?