Deer Rifles and Shoes

Here is a snippet of a conversation I had recently with Wrangler Boy:


"I need to get a deer rifle" WB states early one morning.

Laughing, "Oh, okay, sure."

Giving me the look, "No, really."

Snapping to attention, "Why? You don't hunt."

Smiling, "I don't hunt because I don't own a rifle."

This is what I refer to as lawyer talk. He's good at it, talking in circles is a gift and he has it. He thought about going to law school and I have no doubt he would have made an excellent lawyer. But my house is not a courtroom and so I remind him.

"That is crazy you are not even into hunting. You feed the wildlife around here, enjoy watching the deer, and if you are going to hunt anything it would be with your camera." (He's an amateur photographer and quite good)

"Listen, I need something to be cleaning when the boys start knocking on our door."

Switching tactics, another good lawyer trick. And I'm wondering why one of the other guns he owns wouldn't scare the boys, but I don't say that.

"Umm, hon that will be at least another ten years."

"Still and I need something to talk with the guys about. Men bond over guns."

See, I had no idea about this, I learn something new every day!

And here's the thing. He wants the rifle, period. He works hard, he provides for his family and this is something that he will enjoy. Who am I to stand between a man and his rifle? Come to think of it I would rather not stand between, beside, in front of, any man and his rifle!

The gun came last week. It's a beautiful, black heavy thing. I smiled as he told me all about it, nodded like I understood and ohhed and ahhed in all the right places. But my girls weren't quite sure about why Daddy needed another gun. And into my head I had a thought, it was like the heavens opened and gave me these words:

I said, "It's like girls and their shoes. We need lots of different pairs and guys don't really get that do they."

Both girls nodded, they'd explained many times to their Dad why their hot pink boots could not be worn with their orange skirt, or why those were dress shoes not their school shoes.

"Well, guys need different guns for different things. It's just one of those things."

"Exactly, that's what it's like." WB chimed in thrilled that everyone understood.

Both girls reflected on this for a few minutes. Then I heard a whisper from the backseat-

"This would probably be a good time to tell Daddy our new tennis shoes won't work with our Easter dresses."